If you think some people are just born happy, the folks who study genes agree. It seems that we have a sort of happiness baseline. If you’re not born with a high baseline, don’t despair; a lot of our happiness indeed is in our control. But don’t count on external things or events to make you happy, because we as human beings naturally adjust all too quickly to the “happiness” we think they will bring.
There’s even a label for that. It’s called “Hedonistic Adaptation.” The glow doesn’t last. Ever notice how soon the happiness fades after you get a new outfit? or a promotion? or new house? or improved health? or more money? or marriage? or a baby?
Instead, happiness or contentment or “Subjective Well-being” comes from certain behaviors and attitudes which you can adopt–even if you think you weren’t born happy.
You’ve probably noticed that happy people
- Spend time with friends and loved ones–and really nurture only supportive relationships.
- Seem to live in the moment; they enjoy this moment and this day rather than anticipate some future happiness.
- Look for what is (or might be) good in any given situation–and so keep a positive focus.
- Spend free time doing things they simply love to do–activities that are delightful in themselves as opposed to being a means to some future joy.
The opposite of happiness is depression–which is often the result of chronic stress. If you live with worry and stress, EFT can help. Call me.